A combination holiday letter and annual reflection.
I have noticed we are receiving far more holiday cards and letters than has been the case in recent years. With time on their hands and lacking social interaction, people are making the effort to communicate. I used to do the same and created a letter with pictures every year bragging about our kids and telling about the experiences of the year. I got out of the habit when I started to write online. So, I thought I would compromise and write a holiday letter online.
So, to get the basics out of the way. We are all well and doing fine. Obviously, the year has been unique in our lives, but all things considered we must be better off than most. We got our Hawaii trip in before the pandemic got bad. Actually, we cut the trip short by two weeks when no one seemed to know what was going on and headed back to Minnesota. There will be no trip this year. Our kids, also doing well, live close and we have some backyard get-togethers keeping the appropriate social distance. We have individual pizzas or some other food delivered and we set around someone’s backyard. This is tougher now as it gets cold, but we plan to try a driveway fire on Christmas eve. Cindy and I move back and forth between our home in the suburbs and at the lake without stops between. The rest of our family also makes use of the lake – we just can’t be there together. Those from our immediate family who work in schools or medical settings have not caught COVID although there have been some quarantines and all of the grandkids ended the year doing distance ed. Four-old Frankie likes “the Google”. The older kids consider the camera on or off controversy and have come to different conclusions. Sid, the first grader and his classmates tried different things to see if they could help their teacher when she was unable to connect to run the class. Just turn it off and back on. Porter and dad are trying to figure out how to connect to their teacher’s holiday break Minecraft game. We understand many other folks have not been so lucky in their work requirements or with the health of their friends and families.
Some serious thoughts for what has seemed a serious year.
The following comments are my own and are simply some personal thoughts about the year. I understand 2020 has been extremely difficult and stressful for many reasons. However, 2020 has also provided a great opportunity. The lessons were often not pleasant, but were lessons nonetheless. The question is whether we will listen to and accept what we learned?
I think we learned that the country we live in is far from perfect and that many of us are shielded from considering these imperfections to any depth. Inequities and biases abound and we fail to recognize or more often do something about these failures. If you are white, male, and lucky to come from a family that got you off to a good start in life, you probably have not considered the advantages you have. The work I did for a living provided plenty of opportunities to consider this situation and I explained some of these issues to students many times, but I don’t think I thought about this reality as carefully as I have this year.
Social media taught us much about ourselves and others. Many are concerned that social media as an alternative to face to face interaction has resulted in meanness and hate. Psychologists have been studying the disinhibition effect of technology-enabled interaction for a long time now. There is something to the concerns that the lack of visual cues and the distance allows the expression of things not likely to be said when involved in direct interaction. Educators have tried to teach kids to be more thoughtful. Many adults have missed these lessons. I have a mixed reaction to this reality. There are clearly issues with technology-supported communication some the result of the tools (e.g., Twitter encourages brief comments limiting complete explanations allowing misinterpretation), but many are simply a function of the lack of care on the part of participants. Maybe, what we are seeing is what was always there but hidden.
I could write many pages about my own online experiences, but I will make two quick observations. First, I understand the process of argumentation differently from some. Academics use this term in a way to describe what most might understand as debate. They are used to arguing as part of what they do. Scientists, historians, etc. pretty much take a position and then defend this position based on the reasons they can advance and the evidence they can muster for these reasons. The process is supposed to move understanding forward as the better reasoning with better evidence is to prevail. I try to argue online with others within this spirit. A comment here or there might be a bit snarky, but this is always the case and those who understand the process try to keep it under control. The study of the development of argumentation skill is interesting and shows the young kids argue for a position by repeating their perspective without much evidence and pretty much by ignoring what those they are engaged in a formal argument with are saying. With maturity and practice, they get better. More reasons, more evidence, and more acknowledgement and reaction to the reasons and evidence of those taking a different position. Much of what I see online resembles the early approach of kids – little evidence and little attempt to counter reasons and evidence offered by others. There is too much posting of the memes generated by others and not enough writing to explain reasons and evidence.
I also tend to differentiate positions I understand others can have legitimate reasons to take and those they take but I refuse to accept on the basis of core beliefs. For example, I don’t accept that inequity is acceptable, that climate change is not real, that all people don’t deserve health care, that sexism and racism exist, etc. Challenging these positions is not argumentation as reasons and evidence are not particularly relevant. Then, I take challenges personally. When I encounter others who refuse to accept these values, I admit I think less of them. The presence of differences in core values has been an unpleasant reality I have recognized during the Trump era.
The other reality the online world has taught me is that some refuse to accept science. I don’t know if this qualifies as what I consider a value or not, but it just seems like ignorance. Maybe it is more than acceptance that is at issue, but I don’t know what to call it then. Maybe ignorance or maybe indifference. But, issues such as the refusal to take the steps necessary to respond to COVID or to accept the reality of climate change fall into this category. Maybe these issues have become politicized which seems silly but possible. It ends up like a pass interference call. Those supporting different teams have the same evidence, but come to different conclusions predictable from the team they support. Science shouldn’t be like that. As an educator, I tended to assume people thought strange things because they had yet to learn the scientific facts. It is clear it is more complicated and I am not certain educators can change what I observe.
So, I think this year has increased my understanding of things I previously thought I understood better. I guess I would say that learning about reality is necessary, but not always pleasing.
These are some personal reflections on 2020 which I admit was a year unlike any other I have experienced in my 72 years. I see some significant challenges ahead, but I also feel more confident these challenges will be addressed than I did a year ago. Being helpless is an unacceptable mindset people adopt to free them from responsibility.
Best wishes to all whatever your perspective on the topics I have presented here.
We got together in a local park to take some family photos of each other a few months ago. Todd had to work, but the rest of our extended family made it. For those who know us, here are some photos.
